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The Difficulty with Hearing "You Got This!" from People

Updated: Apr 2, 2021



I’m sure you heard this statement before “ You got this”. It is said to you whenever you are exerting a level of energy into something and someone watching from afar, or as a bystander comes over and tell you, “you got this”. If you are trying to lose weight, start a new project, achieve a goal, no matter what it is, this seems to be the default motivational statement to assist in pushing you to your goal. Whether they believe it, or you believe it, it had to be said. Right? Though it is an encouraging statement here is my difficulty with hearing this.



Recently I started to hear this statement often. For example, I would speak to a friend about my vision, goals, the things I am working on and there it came next, uttered out of their mouth. “You got this”. Not much to recall about what I said, as long as I knew, that they knew, that it was attainable.


There is nothing wrong with that because it is a nice thing to say, but It started to bother me more than help me. The reality is I don’t have what it is I am trying to obtain, therefore the statement acts as a reminder of this, but on the other hand it is suppose to act as an inspiration to provoke a change. Therefore, it gives a contradictory motive. It then makes me wonder ”will I get this?”


 


Being a child that was vocal about what I wanted and the 'go-getter,' I often heard things like “You got this”, “Keep pushing”, “Don’t stop” and so on. It seemed more motivational back then because the things I worked towards, I could see on the horizon and had references to point me in the right direction.


Things like matriculation through college, moving on my own, and starting a new job. These were things I was able to identify. However, I am in a space where I am not where I use to be, but not where I want to be, and where I am and where I am going seems so far apart from one another. There is no length, depth, or width to help me to identify how long it will take me to get there.




What is difficult, is that when you become labeled as the 'go-getter' there is this idea that help is no longer needed, being checked on is no longer needed because “ You got this”. It’s like growing up and your parents, parents’ you less because they see “you got this” because your other siblings need them more, or when you ask for advice and a friend diminishes your feelings because " you got this" and your problem is not nearly as bad as their situation, or if you are given a task or challenge from work with no direction or proper training and the only thing they can say is “ you got this''.


You are left to figure everything out everyone seems to believe in you. You have nothing you should complain about, right?, WRONG. There is a level of self-motivation you have to maintain because to everyone else, up into now you always did what you said you would do, so why should this be any different?



It’s funny, we all should have a vision for our lives and strive and work for it even if it isn’t yet here and this statement reassures the same. As visionaries, we have to stay consistent, strategic, disciplined and driven. We have to constantly be working, building, and growing our vision to get to it. Imagine you were running a 5k and your family and friends at the start say “you got this” and all you have until the end of the race is a memory of what they said.


Though it was said you are still tired and fatigued you have to stay self-motivated until you actually “get it” or in this case finish. That is my difficulty, I won't always feel like what others think. This is why we should learn to check on friends and pace are selves in between milestones. This thing called life is a long journey to what ever you seek takes time.



Whether you feel this way or maybe your 'go-getter' friend, check on them. They may be losing their spark as they push to the finish line. They may hope to see you on the sidelines cheering them on and meeting them at the halfway mark and encouraging them far beyond just the statement of “you got this” but saying other things like, “Don’t Stop”, “You are almost there”, “remember why you started”, “I believe in you”, “Don’t give up”, or “You are stronger than you think”. With each step, they will gain an inner power to keep pressing. Their legs then don’t feel so heavy and the finish line doesn’t seem so far. With these types of encouraging words you then believe you really do got this!





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